Ain't this fun?

One of the things you discover when you're ailin' -- really took poorly, not just under the weather -- is that things tend to cascade in wierd ways. You take one drug to counteract the root problem, which brings with it a side effect like, say, water retention. Puffy feet. So a helpful doctor prescribes another drug to take care of that. Which just happens to flush out potassium. So you wake up at 4:00 AM with a calf cramping up like you'd just run a marathon. So you eat bananas. Not an anticipated aspect of this (as all the helpful types are so quick to call it) "journey."

Oh, well. Here's an old post from 2000, back when Pinochet was hiding out in the UK, dodging a Spanish Judge. Vaguely medical, I guess. I honestly don't remember what the reference to Mark Murray was about -- I suppose I was honked off at Engler again about something.

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GROUPS CALL FOR MORE PINOCHET TESTS

Ann Arbor: Although a team of government flacks in doctor suits ... that is, medical experts have ruled that former Chilean rap star Augusto Pinochet is "unfit" to stand trial, the Spanish judge who wants his (Pinochet's) wrinkled old ass on a platter has called for a second round of tests, administered by a team of his own choosing. Meanwhile, other groups interested in seeing something remotely resembling justice done are issuing their own demands for tests; a quick tabulation of the paperwork shows that if all the requests were complied with, Pinochet would be undergoing 324 treadmill stress exams, taking part in 37 clinical trials to determine the effect of prolonged spanking on elderly ex-dictators, and "several" rigid sigmoidoscopies.

British Home Secretary Jack Straw countered with a brief arguing that Pinochet should be allowed to return home, since being forced to remain in Britain throughout a Fall and Winter was "punishment enough."

Meanwhile, back in Chile, a Socialist presidential candidate was elected for the first time since the CIA ... that is, Chilean rightist elements ousted and murdered Salvador Allende in 1970. President Ricardo Lagos issued a statement shortly after the election results were known, enumerating the initiatives he had in mind, including a new presidential residence, 40 feet underground and hardened to resist a direct hit from a nuclear warhead. "Better safe than sorry," he is quoted as saying.

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The Wood-Charles News Service is brought to you by the Odd Town Tavern, at the corner of Full Employment and Tax Cut, in beautiful downtown Englerville, which used to be Ann Arbor, but the Governor's appointed member of the city council, Mark my-way-or-the-highway Murray vetoed the measure to defeat the proposal to rename the town after that fat hack in Lansing ... that is, the Governor, and by the Scandinavian Retro-ethnic Drug-crazed Dance Group, Berserk du Soleil, yeah, I know it's a stretch but I've been trying to work that into something since I thought it up over raw fish and sake last Sunday night.

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