The Occasional Joke

Nurse: Patient's name?

Centurion: Marcus Licinius Crassus

Nurse: And his date of birth?

Centurion: 115 BC.

Nurse: All right. And what is he here for?

Centurion: Cataphract surgery.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

On the positive side of the ledger

All is not completely grim in the realm of justice. True, we still have Citizens United in place, and as far as we know, Antonin Scalia has not contracted an embarrassing disease of any kind, but the courts of the world do occasionally turn out a good outcome.

Par example, the International Court, whose wheels grind slowly and very fine, indeed, convicted Charles Taylor for being a vicious, corrupt little Kinglet and, by the way, fomenting war in a neighboring country during his stint as President of Liberia. He got 50 years.

And as that bout of justice-mongering ended, another one kicked off, with Andy Coulson, the former editor of News of the World, Rupert Murdoch's defunct miserable little scandal sheet tabloid, has been arrested for being a lying sack of excrement perjury.

While both of these events are laudable, there is no room for complacency, as Graham Chapman might have put it. Consider:
  • Rupert Murdoch himself has yet to be charged with anything.
  • The species-er movement, a group of people who are demanding DNA tests to determine whether Donald Trump is actually human, remains underfunded and out of the mainstream.
  • Although the TSA nearly got him, Henry Kissinger managed to shoot his way out of an ambush and is still at large.
Stay tuned to the Wood Charles News Service, where we are committed to covering all the obscure news we can invent find.

All right, McLuggage, listen up

Idly glancing at the stats for this blog, I notice that since inception, it's been viewed a total of 6100 times!

Looked at one way, I'm talking to myself. Looked at another, I've managed to annoy people over six thousand times. Would I have been able to accomplish that without the magic of the Internet? Who knows. I could try, but the expenditure for travel and pies would be prohibitive.

Is our candidates lerning?

Romney: In order to better focus on our core competencies, we will be renaming the country.

The next step in the re-branding of the US will be a new tag line, rumored to be Amercia: it's just south of Canadia.