iPhone or not to iPhone

For me, that would be "not," since I rely on several 3rd party packages
that run on Palm OS, and I'm actually quite happy with a relatively new
Treo. But I will look forward to assessing the quality of the first
phone call I get from anyone of y'all from your new Jobs-box. Surely
somebody in our old gang of geeks is out there now, standing in line?

Here are some old whacks at Apple and its prior mistakes, that is, new
product extravaganzas:

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AUTHOR CITES MULTIPLE DISCONTINUITIES

ANN ARBOR: PHILOSOPHY OF SCIENCE ACADEMICS ARE ENGAGING IN AN ESCALATION OF NUMBERED DISCONTINUITIES, IT SEEMS. IN THE COURSE OF DEVELOPING MAN'S VIEW OF THE UNIVERSE, AUTHORS CITE THREE TRADITIONAL DISCONTINUITIES THAT HAVE BEEN OVERCOME, NAMELY THE DISCONTINUITITY BETWEEN EARTH AND THE COSMOS, MAN AND ANIMALS, AND THE RATIONAL MIND AND THE SUBCONSCIOUS. THE ELIMINATIONS OF THESE THREE ARE USUALLY ASSOCIATED WITH COPERNICUS, DARWIN, AND FREUD. SO SAYS JON TURNEY, REVIEWING A BOOK CALLED "THE FOURTH DISCONTINUITY: THE CO-EVOLUTION OF HUMANS AND MACHINES" BY BRUCE MAZLISH. WRITING IN THE APRIL 23RD ISSUE OF "NEW SCIENTIST," TURNEY SAYS THAT MAZLISH GIVES US THE DISCONTINUITY BETWEEN HUMANS AND MACHINES AS THE FOURTH IN THIS SERIES OF BINARY CONUNDRUMS AND GOES ON TO QUOTE MAZLISH AS FOLLOWS:

"MY AIM IS THAT READERS WILL FEEL DEEPLY THAT THEY ARE THAT PARTICULAR EVOLUTIONARY CREATURE WHOSE ORIGINS ARE TO BE FOUND IN BOTH THE ANIMAL AND MACHINE KINGDOMS, WITH THE ANIMAL AND MECHANICAL QUALITIES TOGETHER INCORPORATED IN THE DEFINITION OF HUMAN NATURE."

MAZLISH IS APPARENTLY ONE OF THE STARRY-EYED GROUP THAT SEE THINKING MACHINES AS "A NEW PHASE IN EVOLUTION," AND FOR ALL WE KNOW, HE MAY BE RIGHT. HOWEVER, SOME DISAGREE, FIRST WITH HIS CHARACTERIZATION OF MAN/MACHINE AS THE "FINAL" DISCONTINUITY, AND OTHERS WITH THE VERY BASIS OF HIS ARGUMENT.

IN THE FIRST GROUP IS THE COMBINED FACULTY AND GLEE CLUB OF THE UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN'S CONSORTIUM FOR CUDGELING OTHERS INTO SILENCE WITH NITPICKING AND AD HOMINEM ABUSE. IN A JOINT PAPER, THEY POINTED OUT THE STILL-EXTANT DISCONTINUITIES BETWEEN SERBS AND MUSLIMS, BETWEEN HUTU AND TUTSI, BETWEEN VI AND EMACS, BETWEEN THOSE WITH INTERNET ACCESS AND THOSE USING PRODIGY, BETWEEN THOSE WHO BEGIN PHILOSOPHY OF SCIENCE ARTICLES WITH REFERENCES TO "JURASSIC PARK" AND THOSE WITH TWO BRAIN CELLS TO RUB TOGETHER, AND BETWEEN THOSE WHO THINK THE IDEA OF A FREE VERSION OF NEWT GINGRICH CALLED "GNEWT" IS A REAL THIGH-SLAPPER AND PRACTICALLY EVERYBODY I'VE MENTIONED IT TO.

THE SECOND GROUP OF DETRACTORS COMES FROM THE RELIGIOUS RIGHT WING OF CARNEGIE MELLON'S SOFTWARE ENGINEERING INSTITUTE. THEY DISPUTE WHAT THEY CONSIDER THE BLASPHEMOUS NOTION THAT COMPUTERS EVOLVED FROM MAN, ALTHOUGH THEY ADMIT THAT THE NEWTON DOES SHOW SOME SIMILARITIES TO THE AVERAGE SIXTH-GRADER. "OK, SO IT'S SMALL, AND IT CAN'T SPELL," SAID AN ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR WHO ASKED NOT TO BE IDENTIFIED AS AN ANCESTOR OF THE IBM PC JR. HE POINTED OUT THAT THE BELLEVUE, PA, POLICE DEPARTMENT IS USING NEWTONS, RUNNING SOFTWARE WRITTEN BY CARNEGIE MELLON STUDENTS, AND THAT THIS HAS RESULTED IN 143 ARRESTS OF PEOPLE FOR SELLING RUGS. HE DENIED, HOWEVER, THAT 4 FELONS HAD BEEN RELEASED BECAUSE COURTS WERE UNABLE TO FIND ANY LAWS AGAINST "ARMORED RUBBERY."

WAIT STAFF AT THE ODD TOWN TAVERN ANGRILY DENIED THAT THEY WERE THE ANCESTORS OF MICROPROCESSOR-CONTROLLED TOASTER OVENS.

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