The following story illusetrates a fantastic opportunity to take
products somehow related to a disgraced celebrity (in this case
Michael Vick, the Atlanta Falcons pond scum who plead guilty this
week to various charges related to running a dog fighting enterprize)
and disdain-ize(tm) them by having dogs chew on 'em.
Now between the various dogs residing with us and our near acquaintances,
I figure we can achieve a throughput of 10 to 15 thousand chewed sports cards
a day, especially if we "sweeten" the deal a bit with beef broth
and other chew-performance-enhancing substances. (Even allowing
for the occasional completely-eaten object d'art.)
Then, when we're really up and running, we approach the owner of a
local wash-your-dog shoppe about turning the dog-o-mat into a chewed sports collectibles venue. Imagine: Babe Ruth signed baseballs with ferret bites! Dale Earnhardt NASCAR keychains with St. Bernard slobber! Videos of David Beckham being chased around a soccer pitch by pit bulls! It'll be huge, man!
And don't even get me started about the potential of other
once-precious artifacts with their value enhanced by disrespectful
animal behavior -- reliquaries with paw prints, full size replicas
of Michelangelo's David with a pomeranian gnawing on its ankle,
prints of the Mona Lisa with dog hair on her gown ... the sky's the
limit!
And you cat owners -- no need to be left out!
Let's get the business plan lagged down and get this off the
launch pad! I haven't been so excited since the Y-prize (a million
dollars to the builders of the first rocket to crash on Cleveland.)
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