The Occasional Joke

Nurse: Patient's name?

Centurion: Marcus Licinius Crassus

Nurse: And his date of birth?

Centurion: 115 BC.

Nurse: All right. And what is he here for?

Centurion: Cataphract surgery.

Monday, November 5, 2012

McLuggage Wins in Landslide

In an independent poll conducted by the Wood-Charles News Service, Wood-Charles Founder, financial genius, political expert, and Certified Scrum Master J. Francis McLuggage is likely to win tomorrow's election by a margin of 70+ percentage points. Both the Romney and Obama campaigns conceded defeat, and Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann were arrested outside a Reno, Nevada saloon, duking it out over who would have McLuggage's baby.

At a mass rally, McLuggage told an audience of over 32 million screaming, heavily armed supporters that the announcement was "totally accurate, to the extent that polls are capable of being totally accurate," and fiercely denied that it was just a ploy to see how many page views his blog would generate by carefully tagging this message with election-related keywords.

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