iPhone or not to iPhone

For me, that would be "not," since I rely on several 3rd party packages
that run on Palm OS, and I'm actually quite happy with a relatively new
Treo. But I will look forward to assessing the quality of the first
phone call I get from anyone of y'all from your new Jobs-box. Surely
somebody in our old gang of geeks is out there now, standing in line?

Here are some old whacks at Apple and its prior mistakes, that is, new
product extravaganzas:

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AUTHOR CITES MULTIPLE DISCONTINUITIES

ANN ARBOR: PHILOSOPHY OF SCIENCE ACADEMICS ARE ENGAGING IN AN ESCALATION OF NUMBERED DISCONTINUITIES, IT SEEMS. IN THE COURSE OF DEVELOPING MAN'S VIEW OF THE UNIVERSE, AUTHORS CITE THREE TRADITIONAL DISCONTINUITIES THAT HAVE BEEN OVERCOME, NAMELY THE DISCONTINUITITY BETWEEN EARTH AND THE COSMOS, MAN AND ANIMALS, AND THE RATIONAL MIND AND THE SUBCONSCIOUS. THE ELIMINATIONS OF THESE THREE ARE USUALLY ASSOCIATED WITH COPERNICUS, DARWIN, AND FREUD. SO SAYS JON TURNEY, REVIEWING A BOOK CALLED "THE FOURTH DISCONTINUITY: THE CO-EVOLUTION OF HUMANS AND MACHINES" BY BRUCE MAZLISH. WRITING IN THE APRIL 23RD ISSUE OF "NEW SCIENTIST," TURNEY SAYS THAT MAZLISH GIVES US THE DISCONTINUITY BETWEEN HUMANS AND MACHINES AS THE FOURTH IN THIS SERIES OF BINARY CONUNDRUMS AND GOES ON TO QUOTE MAZLISH AS FOLLOWS:

"MY AIM IS THAT READERS WILL FEEL DEEPLY THAT THEY ARE THAT PARTICULAR EVOLUTIONARY CREATURE WHOSE ORIGINS ARE TO BE FOUND IN BOTH THE ANIMAL AND MACHINE KINGDOMS, WITH THE ANIMAL AND MECHANICAL QUALITIES TOGETHER INCORPORATED IN THE DEFINITION OF HUMAN NATURE."

MAZLISH IS APPARENTLY ONE OF THE STARRY-EYED GROUP THAT SEE THINKING MACHINES AS "A NEW PHASE IN EVOLUTION," AND FOR ALL WE KNOW, HE MAY BE RIGHT. HOWEVER, SOME DISAGREE, FIRST WITH HIS CHARACTERIZATION OF MAN/MACHINE AS THE "FINAL" DISCONTINUITY, AND OTHERS WITH THE VERY BASIS OF HIS ARGUMENT.

IN THE FIRST GROUP IS THE COMBINED FACULTY AND GLEE CLUB OF THE UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN'S CONSORTIUM FOR CUDGELING OTHERS INTO SILENCE WITH NITPICKING AND AD HOMINEM ABUSE. IN A JOINT PAPER, THEY POINTED OUT THE STILL-EXTANT DISCONTINUITIES BETWEEN SERBS AND MUSLIMS, BETWEEN HUTU AND TUTSI, BETWEEN VI AND EMACS, BETWEEN THOSE WITH INTERNET ACCESS AND THOSE USING PRODIGY, BETWEEN THOSE WHO BEGIN PHILOSOPHY OF SCIENCE ARTICLES WITH REFERENCES TO "JURASSIC PARK" AND THOSE WITH TWO BRAIN CELLS TO RUB TOGETHER, AND BETWEEN THOSE WHO THINK THE IDEA OF A FREE VERSION OF NEWT GINGRICH CALLED "GNEWT" IS A REAL THIGH-SLAPPER AND PRACTICALLY EVERYBODY I'VE MENTIONED IT TO.

THE SECOND GROUP OF DETRACTORS COMES FROM THE RELIGIOUS RIGHT WING OF CARNEGIE MELLON'S SOFTWARE ENGINEERING INSTITUTE. THEY DISPUTE WHAT THEY CONSIDER THE BLASPHEMOUS NOTION THAT COMPUTERS EVOLVED FROM MAN, ALTHOUGH THEY ADMIT THAT THE NEWTON DOES SHOW SOME SIMILARITIES TO THE AVERAGE SIXTH-GRADER. "OK, SO IT'S SMALL, AND IT CAN'T SPELL," SAID AN ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR WHO ASKED NOT TO BE IDENTIFIED AS AN ANCESTOR OF THE IBM PC JR. HE POINTED OUT THAT THE BELLEVUE, PA, POLICE DEPARTMENT IS USING NEWTONS, RUNNING SOFTWARE WRITTEN BY CARNEGIE MELLON STUDENTS, AND THAT THIS HAS RESULTED IN 143 ARRESTS OF PEOPLE FOR SELLING RUGS. HE DENIED, HOWEVER, THAT 4 FELONS HAD BEEN RELEASED BECAUSE COURTS WERE UNABLE TO FIND ANY LAWS AGAINST "ARMORED RUBBERY."

WAIT STAFF AT THE ODD TOWN TAVERN ANGRILY DENIED THAT THEY WERE THE ANCESTORS OF MICROPROCESSOR-CONTROLLED TOASTER OVENS.

-30-

Wanna work for Google?

Check this entry in one of the innumerable CNET blogs, first. I didn't find it especially surprising, particularly including their disinterest in experience -- so much of their stuff acts like they just thought it up and launched it.

Deploying New Technology

My new hat, new sunglasses, and new crutches

After a couple of shots at cooking whilst hobbling around on one crutch, we were brainstorming other possibilities -- and the notion of a casters-equipped, height-adjustable bar stool came up. I could scoot around on it, both hands available, do prep, watch things on the stove, even load/unload the dishwasher. But where would you ever get such a thing?

Ha! One search on the internet brought Linda to http://www.sourcemedicalequipment.com/, where they have a vast array of "task chairs." I have a deluxe version on its way, complete with a big height range, foot rest, special hard-floor casters, multi-port fuel injection, and the ability to run on premium unleaded, biodiesel, or leftover Riesling. Cain't hardly wait.

Meanwhile, situation with hip improves day to day, somewhat slowly. I may actually be back "at work," although virtually, not literally, as early as next week.

A toe hold

In what the media is comparing to the US troop surge in Iraq, 50% of one cook
was redeployed to the kitchen green zone at our house last night. Specially
trained in techniques such as moving one thing at a time around in the left hand while moving into combat on a single crutch in the right, US forces were able to prepare a sausage with balsamic reduction pasta sauce from scratch, while other units focused on dog walks and on moving heavy weapons such as pots of boiling water.

"It is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is the end of the beginning," said Winston Churchill.

How efficient

The argument went like this: A tumor in your hip has removed enough bone that you are extremely likely to fracture something down there, and then it'll be non-trivial to repair. So let's do the repair first, before the fracture occurs, and that'll be trivial, and you'll be walking around in a couple of days.

We pondered this, and decided that "trivial" sounded Ok, and had the surgery. But recovery the last week has been painful and far, far short of "walking around." More like crawling around.

So yesterday, we had the followup-appointment with the osteopod and some x-rays. Turns out that either during or immediately after the surgery, we also had the fracture! Who knew? Neither us nor the doc who was equally surprised to see the pics. Nothing more to be done, since the procedure he did was exactly what he would have done, anyway, and the various kinds of pain, need for crutches for weight-bearing, etc. is explained by the break, so it's still better to have it all over with, but the recovery from the, um, surgery/fracture won't be quite as quick as they thought -- more like a couple of months than a couple of days.

Things somehow, seemed to look up yesterday, though, whether it had anything to do with knowing what's going on in there or actual improvement. I'm hobbling with more vigor, although cooking is an issue, since I can a) move around or b) carry things, not both. But if given a chair and a table, I can do immoble kinds of prep like shelling peas and giving instruction to sous chefs, and so we tried out team-cooking chicken and rice with fresh peas, last night, to great success. Timing is an issue, since I used to cook while Linda gave Coney her evening walk, but we'll work that out, too.

And no, before you ask, we did not watch the last of the Soprano's. To those who did, our condolences, and may your grief be short lived.

Don't get no respect

Pakistani President Pervez Musharraf is apparently channelling the spirit of Rodney Dangerfield. This from a Griff Witte Washington Post Foreign Service analysis this morning.

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"I bluntly say you always leave me alone in time of trial and tribulation," Musharraf told the lawmakers, according to a report in the News, an English-language paper. "You are not delivering. You have lost the war of nerves. You all are silent upon what the media is doing. If I myself have to do everything then you are for what purpose."

A strange ruling

The United States Court of Appeals for the Second Circuit in New York ruled today that the FCC can't punish broadcasters for "fleeting profanity" when both our President and Vice President have been broadcast doing exactly that. Weird. I'm not going to detail all this, but you can read it for yourself here.
However, I will append an old Wood-Charles News Service item, from an unknown date in the 1990's, that may have some vague relevance.

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KILLER QUESTIONS: LATEST POLITICAL PLOY?

ANN ARBOR: POLITICAL SCIENTISTS AT THE UNIVERSITY OF MICHIGAN'S STASSEN INSTITUTE FOR THE STUDY OF PERSISTENT IF SOMEWHAT OFF-THE-WALL POLITICAL FIGURES ARE TRACKING WHAT THEY BELIEVE MAY BE A NEW TACTIC IN THE INCREASINGLY MEDIA-DRIVEN AMERICAN POLITICAL VAUDEVILLE. THEY CITE THE RECENT DISMISSAL OF JOCELYN ELDERS AS THE MOST VISIBLE AND VISIBLY SUCCESSFUL RESULT OF THIS NEW FORM OF ATTACK: THE GIVE-'EM-ENOUGH-ROPE PLOY. THE FACTS ABOUT ELDERS' UNFORTUNATE COMMENTS -- REGARDED AS THE LAST STRAW IN HER INCREASINGLY SHAKY RELATIONSHIP WITH THE WHITE HOUSE -- BEGAN TO EMERGE THIS WEEK AS REPORTERS FINALLY TRACKED DOWN AND CORNERED THE AMERICAN PSYCHIATRIC ASSOCIATION OFFICIALS RESPONSIBLE FOR THE EVENT AT WHICH ELDERS MADE HER LET'S-TEACH-KIDS-WANKING STATEMENT.

AN APA SPOKESSHRINK ISSUED A RAMBLING AND CONTRADICTORY ACCOUNT IN WHICH HE FIRST SUGGESTED THAT THE PERSON WHO ASKED ELDERS THE DEADLY QUESTION ("SO, DOC, WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT SELF ABUSE, ANYWAY?") WAS NOT AN APA MEMBER AT ALL, BUT A CHIROPRACTOR WHO HAD WANDERED INTO THE WRONG MEETING ROOM BY MISTAKE. HE THEN REVERSED HIMSELF AND SAID THAT IT WAS ACTUALLY RUSH LIMBAUGH IN DISGUISE. PRESSED
FOR DETAILS, HE SHOWED REPORTERS A SERIES OF RORSCHACH BLOTS, AND ASKED THEM HOW LONG THEY'D HATED THEIR MOTHERS.

WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN SEEN AS AN ISOLATED OCCURRENCE ASSUMED ADDED SIGNIFICANCE YESTERDAY DURING A VICE PRESIDENTIAL PRESS CONFERENCE. A MAN IDENTIFYING HIMSELF AS GOOT NINGRITCH AND WEARING A FALSE NOSE AND MUSTACHE ASKED GORE IF HE FELT THAT MANDATORY LSD INJECTIONS FOR SPOTTED-OWL RAPERS WAS OR WAS NOT FUNDED IN THE NEW CRIME BILL. THE VICE PRESIDENT DODGED THE QUESTION AND WAS ALSO EVASIVE IN RESPONSE TO A FOLLOW-UP ABOUT FORMING SQUADS OF INNER CITY YOUTHS AND SENDING THEM OUT INTO THE NATIONAL FORESTS TO SPIKE TREES.

THEN, DURING AN APPEARANCE ON THE BARNEY THE DINOSAUR SHOW, SENATOR JESSE HELMS WAS ASKED BY THE PURPLE AND GREEN TALK SHOW HOST WHAT HE THOUGHT SHOULD BE DONE TO GAY WELFARE MOMS. THE SENATOR RESPONDED AT LENGTH AND IN TERMS THAT LENT CREDENCE TO RECENT RUMORS THAT HE
HELPED SCRIPT THE FILM, "PULP FICTION." AIDES TO HELMS LATER DENIED THAT HE SAID ANYTHING OR WAS IN FACT ON THE SHOW, AND ADDED THAT 90% OF THE PROGRAM'S PRE-SCHOOL AUDIENCE WOULDN'T KNOW WHAT A BASTINADO WAS, ANYWAY.

EXPERTS AT THE STASSEN INSTITUTE SUGGESTED THAT INITIAL PUBLIC REACTION WOULD BE UNFAVORABLE, PERHAPS FOR THE SAME REASONS THAT MOST POLLS SHOW VOTERS ANNOYED BY NEGATIVE CAMPAIGN RHETORIC, DESPITE THE WIDESPREAD SUCCESS OF CANDIDATES EMPLOYING IT. HOWEVER, THE POLITICAL SCIENTISTS DID FEEL THAT THE PRACTICE WOULD HAVE A LONG- TERM POSITIVE IMPACT IN THAT IT WOULD MAKE POLITICIANS MORE AND MORE UNWILLING TO SAY ANYTHING OR EVEN TO APPEAR IN PUBLIC, "AND GOD KNOWS, THAT WOULD BE A RELIEF."

THIS WEEK'S WOOD-CHARLES NEWS SERVICE HAS BEEN BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE FINE FOLKS AT THE ODD TOWN TAVERN, WHO, IN A RECENT INTERVIEW, APOLOGIZED FOR THE GAP IN NEWS COVERAGE DURING THE LAST FEW WEEKS, CITING EXHAUSTION AND A GENERAL SHORTAGE OF ANYTHING FUNNY TO WRITE ABOUT. REPORTERS POINTED OUT THAT THE LATTER CIRCUMSTANCE HAD NOT BEEN AN OBSTACLE UP TO NOW, AND MANAGEMENT OFFERED TO PROVIDE THE NEXT ROUND OF TEMPEH BURGERS ON THE HOUSE.
- 30 -

Rumor Control and Status Check

2007 06 04: Ok - so I had the surgery. Here's what they stuck in my hip - a "gamma nail," as it's called, for some reason. We're home (poor Linda stayed with me for two nights, in a barca-lounger in the hospital room -- not a great sleeping experience), and I'm gimping around and complaining. Painful, but looking at this picture, I'm surprised it isn't more so, I guess.

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Didn't you always sort of suspect?

If you get the Sunday NY Times, have a look at the "Fashion Magazine," and in particular, the ad for Borgata Hotel Casino & Spa, in Atlantic city. It features a woman doing something with nautical decor, but it's about their restaurant, Sea Blue, "by Michael Mina."

The tag line is, "When food becomes an art, an appetite is entirely optional."

So if the chef uses enough silly prep techniques (liquid nitrogen) or chemistry class ingredients (Methylcellulose) or wierd presentation (savory lollipops), it won't matter if you're hungry? You'll still pay top whack just to say you were there, whether the food tasted like anything or not? I guess that's what it takes to compete in casino towns or no-class towns (Atlanta and Houston come to mind). But it still seems strange to admit it in your promotional material.

By the way, if you look at the Michael Mina link, you'll find him in a number of no-class towns, mostly Las Vegas, but also, strangely, San Francisco. Wonder if his ads for that place focus just a bit more on taste and less on "art?"

Joe's Chemo Crunch

So I'm not much of a breakfast guy, but these days, I need to quickly gobble something fairly substantial along with the steroids. Later on, Hobbit-like, I tend to have second breakfast, but in case you have any interest, here's the formulary for a bowl of gunk that seems to buffer Dexamethasone pretty effectively.

• 1 cup of some kind of sugar-free oat Os. Doesn't matter which one.
  
• 1 handful dark raisins
  
• 2 dried apricots, chopped
  
• 2 tbsp salted cashews
  
• 1 or 2 large strawberries, chopped
  
• 1/2 banana, sliced
  
• milk to taste
  

Mix; share bites with dog. Drink most of remaining milk. Allow dog to lick bowl.