A simple question

It's 12:30 AM on a Saturday, and it is not the Fourth of July. Who decides to go outside and set off half a dozen or so large fire crackers? And why? Choose one or more of the following reasons:

• I am an inconsiderate prat.
  
• My neighbors are getting too much sleep. I'm doing them a favor, really.
  
• I'm trying to see how quickly the Ann Arbor Police can respond.
  
• I don't agree with Michigan's recently liberalized fireworks law, and consequently I want to influence voters to lobby for more restrictive ordinances.
  
• Those weren't firecrackers. I was shooting at kids to get them off my lawn.
  

Whichever of these reasons (except the last one; we're cool with that) motivate pyrotechnics enthusiasts, they should consider the following: when and where I grew up, we didn't pay for expensive fireworks. We just stepped out the back door and cranked off a few rounds of ammunition. Old habits die hard.